DO's and DONT's

Some helpful DO's and DON'Ts of vactioning

1) DON'T expect a welcome full of ceremonious fanfare. You might have to descend a flight of stairs directly off of the plane straight into sweltering heat and heavy air. No gradual acclamation to the climate here, people. Those pseudo-smiling flight attendants rush you off that jet faster than you can say "BUH-BYE"

2) DON'T avoid daily visits to the gym just because you're on vacation....

........ especially when you're eatting delectable dishes such as this every night.

(Stone Bowl at Guacamaya's)

3)DO make sure the dusty, dirt road to your surf destination truly is deserted before blanket-shielding your friend on the side of the road while she goes to the bathroom.

Note the truck in the background. It came outta nowhere!!

4) DO bribe the locals. They are very particular about who visits their beaches and surfs their breaks. Payoffs accepted in the form of Chile Cheetos, Spicy Nacho Doritos, and littered cardboard boxes.

And beware of the super friendly ones. They always have a hidden agenda. They may seem harmless enough......
..... but they'll end up taking you for a ride.

5)DO utilize the pool as often as possible. Just be prepared to save a drunk old lady who comes to do water aerobics and ends up drowning. (Yes, this really happened. No, she didn't die.)

(This is the pool at Las Olas and is not the location of the drowning drama.)

6) DO vacation with goofy friends. DON'T pay attention to crazy looks from strangers. DO milk inside jokes for all they're worth.


7) DO body surf. DON'T worry about all the sand. All body parts need to be exfoliated at least once in your lifetime.
8) DO enjoy a week off of your Mommy & Daddy duties.

9) DON'T forget to blog about about your vacation.

10) DO repeat annually.